I lost my language

I lost my language when
a thousand whispers told me it wasn’t worth keeping
The early Saturday mornings in class
were interfering with my weekends.

Now don’t get me wrong:
I am thankful for the priviledges I hold
granted by
English proficiency;
my communication skills
my writing abilities

But something still makes me feel raw
when I could not describe to my grandpa
the great depths to which I loved him
on those heavy days preceding his passing.
And years earlier
when I could never assure him
I was eager to listen when he wanted to talk
about grandma after she had also gone–
maybe then could his tears flow a little more easily.

And it still doesn’t sit right with me
when I could not explain to my grandma
how much ill health it perpetuated inside me
when she’d criticized my body;
A stolen chance
to make amends
Instead lay a silent chasm between us
until she died and
I was on the other side of the country.

Great regrets hurricane through me
as I desperately grasp ruptured threads of
my ancestor’s resonances
All that remains is
an immense lump in my throat
accumulated with
words that got lost in transit or
arrived too late to be received
bereaved messengers that never fullfilled their purpose.

Yet I know my language isn’t too late to find again
because even though all my of grandparents have left
I could at least pray to them
in a way they’d want me to.

Yoni Shakti Rising

Meditating Women: 6″ x 8″ x 1.5″ Acrylic on Birch Panels
Inspired by a series of solo meditation retreats and dedicated to all badass femmes, activists, and healers alike

Be aware of this movement. She is growing and unstoppable.
Yoni Shakti is rising, and you’d best be accountable.
Yoginis and allies: spread the word.
The fire of surivors will be heard,
so that femmes may reclaim yoga in it’s original canvas–
a powerful tool for healing and justice.

COMPILATION OF EVIDENCE [info]
A list of highly positioned yoga teachers who have enacted gender-based abuse unto their students, along with their supporting institutions.

THIRTEEN WARNING SIGNALS [info] [poster]
Cautionary indicators that a yoga teacher, community, and/ or institution may be perpetrating gender-based abuse.

NINE CALLS TO ACTION [info] [poster]
What we must do to effectively resist and dismantle industrial yoga’s structures of gender-based abuse.

WOMB-FRIENDLY YOGA MANIFESTO [info]
Yoga techniques to avoid or practice with caution throughout the womb’s various cycles and conditions.

How to heal yourself from the inside out

HippocampusThe Birth and Death of Memories: 800 x 524 px
Golgi Stain of the Hippocampus by The Geisel School of Medicine at Dartmouth

Step 1:
Walk.
Breath.
Sit and
peel away the layers
one
by
one.
Take time to
observe all
nooks and crannies
everywhere and
in between
delicate folds
within your
deepest sheaths.
Step 2:
Hold your wounds
with a quality of
tenderness
warmth and
Compassion.
Listen to your heart and
every beat it echoes as you
Honor and
Adore
its raw exposure.
Embrace this
divine mass and
promise
you’ll always
Be there.
Step 3:
Love and be loved.
Radiate
that mushy goo
out of every cell in your
Heart.
Connect with other
Wholehearts
and allow them to
beat beside you
in a
triumphant rhythm
that    roars
all that is
Good
across the sky.

Dharana

Dharana: 11″ x 4″ Watercolor on Cold Press

Focus on a single object. It could be anything. God or a mushroom. Whatever else is happening, whatever is swirling through your head… concentrate like its the most important thing in the entire universe. Grow acutely aware of every tiny detail of the object, as if consumed in a metaphysical dance with it. And when the chaos tries to steal you away– smile at it. Then, refocus.

My Mother’s Plants

SunburstSunburst: 24″ x 24″ Acrylic on Canvas Print

The plants that
Sit
inside my mother’s house are
Gorgeously Blooming
all year long
with
Radiant Life.

She hasn’t read a single book on
horticulture or
used a special fertilizer but I think
they   trust   her.
Although they haven’t been around her whole life
I have a feeling they Know
of

all the meals she cooked for us
all the messes she cleaned up after us
all the dreams she made real for us and
all the nuturance she channeled to us
when we had fallen to the ground and could not get up
on our own–

I have a good feeling they Know
that she risked her life escaping war for us
that she worked day and night to build a better life for us
that she breathed patiently throughout our reckless years for us and
that she loved us to the moon no matter what.

I’m fairly certain they’ve always Known
that their life was sown
by
Selfless   Hands
enamoured with
more than enough
Care
they needed to   g r o w.

A Yogic Prayer for Ahimsa (Non-Violence)

May we always practice growing conscious of how we interact with all living beings– humans, animals, and plants alike– respecting the unity of life and reducing our collective suffering as much as we are able.

May we recognize that sexism, racism, LGBTQ+ discrimination, classism, and ableism are humankind’s samskaras (ingrained patterning), serving as systematized frameworks for violence. With this higher awareness, may we override these lower level processes and replace them instead with equality, justice, and peace.

May we stand tall with survivors of violence, amplifying their voice in strategic resistance. May we likewise channel our empathetic sorrows into compassionate action.

May we not forgot to heal our own wounds with tender love, and strive to halt the cycles of harm within and around us.

May our methods for addressing harm be wise, assertive, and patient. May we find the strength to transform our anger, judgement, and fears into a steady flame for diplomatic problem solving.

May we continually cultivate qualities of loving-kindness, empathetic joy, compassion, and equanimity, and allow that energy to ripple with gentle persistence into the karmic ocean of earth.

May we utilize the sacred practices of yoga intelligently to revolutionize the above ideals into reality.

Om Shanti Om.

Love Grows

Love Grows: 11″ x 14″ Watercolor and Ink on Cold Press

Maitri (loving-kindness) is not an uncontrollable force of nature, subject to the volatile highs and lows of the human mind. It is not something you just get persuaded into accidentally by the damned physical laws of attraction, for better or for worse. Maitri is an infinite energy, limitless and timeless. It can be grown like a tree, so tall and so strong, yet delicately sensitive and responsive to its environment; adaptive within a multitude of climates. Rooted in the fertile grounds of anahata (heart cakra), the practice of cultivation and care rests in your hands.